Birth Partner | For Everyone at the Birth

Why Practice Relaxation

Relaxation during labor is a skill that improves with practice. The more your partner practices releasing tension in a calm setting, the easier it will be to do during a contraction. Practice this exercise together several times before labor so the cues become familiar.

Getting Ready

Find a quiet space where your partner will not be interrupted. Dim the lights. Your partner can lie on their side with pillows between the knees or sit in a comfortable chair. Take three slow breaths together before starting.

The Relaxation Script

Read the following slowly, pausing between each sentence. Use a calm, steady voice. Your partner does not need to do anything except listen and follow the instructions as they feel right.

Bring your attention to your feet. Notice any tension in your feet and ankles. Take a breath and let that tension go.
Move your attention to your legs. Feel your calves and your thighs. With each breath, let your legs soften and sink into the surface beneath you.
Bring your awareness to your hips and your pelvis. This is where a lot of work will happen. For now, let your hips be heavy and relaxed.
Notice your belly and your lower back. Breathe into your belly and feel it rise. Let your lower back relax on the exhale.
Bring your attention to your chest and your shoulders. Drop your shoulders away from your ears. Let your chest open.
Move to your arms and your hands. Shake out any remaining tension. Let your hands rest loosely.
Bring your attention to your neck and your jaw. Let your jaw go slack. Part your lips slightly.
Finally, bring your awareness to your face. Soften your forehead, your eyes, your mouth.
Now take a slow breath in and a long breath out. Notice how your body feels. This is the sensation of relaxation. You can return to it anytime you choose.

During Labor

During labor, use shorter versions of this script. Focus on one body part at a time. The jaw, shoulders, and hands are especially important because tension collects there during contractions. A single sentence, like Drop your shoulders, can be enough when your partner is in the middle of a contraction.